Ending a relationship is never fun on both parties, being heartbroken is the worst feeling i've ever encountered and makes me afraid to fall for someone again, but as i'm slowly dipping my toes in the dating pool again, I want to reflect on the things i've learnt from previous relationships.
- Love isn't enough reason to stay in a relationship with someone.
This hurt like hell and is probably the reason why my last relationship ended, we were still in love with each other but the spark had gone, the light had gone out for us both, I still love him to this day but not in the same way that I did 2 years ago, when we were both besotted with each other. You have to realise that you can be in love with each other but not happy, you can still care for each other but the chemistry fizzles out, even when you try and put the effort in, it can appear fake.
- He taught me that I am indeed stronger than I knew. He said it and he was right.
This ones so important to me, when I was poorly last year, I gave up on everything, I was too ashamed to go out, too ashamed to go see my friends and I wouldn't even let him kiss or cuddle me as I was so embarrassed for the way that I looked. He taught me that I would overcome this and he helped me become strong and feel beautiful within my skin. He was my rock whenever I felt low and I honestly thank him so much for that!
- He taught me what I should expect from a partner (be it romantic or platonic).
He gave me so many good times and I hope I can enjoy such things with a new partner. I loved sitting in matching pyjamas, getting drunk and listening to The Weekend on full blast annoying the bitch neighbour next door. I loved that you would surprise me with flowers and take me out to nice places and show me off. I loved the fact that your mum liked me even though I always became so shy around her because I wanted her to like me. I loved scoffing our faces with KFC watching Gordon Ramsey and me falling asleep in your arms, surrounded by boneless chicken. Those good times helped create my list of requirements when looking for a friend or a boyfriend. Even if we ended, the good moments have helped shape what I desire in my relationships.
- I had to learn how to bounce back from failed trust.
This is one of the hardest things i've had to learn, believing that someone who would never hurt you does. You hurt me, Gossiping. Rumors. Just plain lying to my face. At times in my life, you absolutely broke me. But you know what the amazing part is?! I haven’t stopped trusting. Just because you betrayed my friendship, it doesn’t mean that I will never trust a friend again! Just because you broke my heart, it doesn’t mean that I will never love again.
I don't regret the last two years of my life as I had so much fun with this person and hope to remain friends, but i'm glad at the lessons it has taught me for new relationships and I hope to learn from the mistakes made.
x
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